The month of June is known as Gay PRIDE month which was created to remember the 1969 Stonewall Riots. It is time for those who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and/or queer to come together and celebrate who they are. It is also a time for those to show continued support for their gay brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, parents, friends etc..... The ultimate goal is to educate people who don't have a full understanding as to what GAY means. The gay community is just like the mainstream heterosexual community, but there are two major differences.One, homosexuals sleep with the same sex whereas heterosexuals sleep with the opposite sex. Second, this is more of a personal belief, homosexuals are far more fun then heterosexuals! As I have gotten older, more and more of my diverse group of friends are beginning to branch off into couples. It is interesting to watch because no matter who you are, when you are single, you are far more fun. However, when we break off into couples, obviously we start to become mini units where we always go with our significant other and thus maybe aren't as crazy as we all once were. For example, I am a lesbian whom was once a crazy, fun, party girl and though I hung out with a bunch of women, I was never really into them enough to be commited as a couple. Then I met my girlfriend, Jo and I have been hooked ever since. My behavior has changed, but not because of the relationship, but I have gotten older. Some of my heterosexual friends though went from being cool single friends to being almost a non-existent straight couple. Oh well, just a thought.
Anyways, June is coming up and I am very excited because not only is it a time to celebrate and go to PRIDE all over the world, but it is also a great time for debate. It is interesting to watch and hear others' reasoning for why gays are disgusting, sick, mentally insane and an abomination. Sometimes it can be overwhelming because their ignorance is so out of line with the truth it is shocking. I have known since I was 4 years old that I was way attracted to women. However, I didn't know the word GAY and it's meaning until I was about 10 years old and by the time I was 13 years old, I secretly identified myself as a lesbian. I continued by life as a heterosexual until my sophmore year in college. I went to visit my best friend, Charlotte, at Clark University and their I met a girl that, within seconds of meeting her, I felt some sort of connection. I was aware of her being bisexual, but I didn't expect it to emotionally effect me as much as it did. I had been around enough gay people to know I was comfortable, but I hadn't had a women release the intense emotion within me until that day.
For the next 3 to 4 days that I was visiting, I found myself overwhelmed with interest in trying to understand what I was feeling and clearly had been feeling for years. I had secretly told myself I was gay, but I had never opened up about it. By the end of my second night there, I broke down and confessed to Charlotte. She was so understanding and supportive that it overwhelmed me with joy. Confused and excited with my new found honesty, I tried to get more of this girls' attention other than the stares at one another from across the room. In the end, I think I was too overwhelmed and embarrassed myself, which I have always wanted to apologize for, but I never regretted it. I left Clark soon after and I couldn't get that girl out of my head or the feeling out of my stomach and thus I broke down and cried.
When I got home I knew what I would have to do. I'd have to start being me and tell the truth which in a Roman Catholic Hispanic family, that was going to be hard. So, I got off the plane and went to have dinner with my mom and over dinner I explained to her my feelings, but they got brushed off as a temporary emotion that would pass. However, I knew it wasn't just going to pass because for years it had been with me just suppressed. For the next two years, coming out was very emotionally draining and exhausting, but fun and the best thing I ever did. Though it is hard sometimes to hear and see all the hatred and misunderstandings that turn so many against us, it is all worth it. I am lucky that I can say I know who I am and that I am happy. I just hope one day the world will be happy with itself enough to understand that ignoring us and removing us will only create more hatred and incorrect stereotypes. I hope that, outside of the month of June, people continue to educate themselves about all communities and to make decisions based on their experiences and beliefs, not what someone tells them to believe which can be confusing once you add religion to the mix.
In the end, being gay isn't a cool trend and it isn't this new group of people that just popped up out of nowhere. I would never wish upon someone the hardships so many of us have to go through everyday just to be who we are. Why would someone wish this for themselves? I must be insane and have thick skin because my hatred comes at me times four. I am a bald, lesbian, roman catholic, hispanic. Enough said.
For more information on understanding visit some of this links:
http://community.pflag.org
http://www.hrc.org
http://www.glsen.org
